We have so many ways on how we process stress, distractions, emotional or simply "how to" process. I have tried SEVERAL different ways and they all work but the one thing I struggled w/ was, and at times, is consistency! I will do something for a day or 3, NOTICE IT WORKS, then old habits pull me back to square one!
ONE of the issues that I realized about myself is, once I notice something works, I tend to slack off on it - because I KNOW IT WORK; and I can just get back to it when I want. Some will say that this is a form of laziness or undisciplined behavior. Though, while that CAN be made as a case, in my personal deep digging, that wasn't it at all.
ADHD, OCD & layered w/ a MILD AF case of D.I.D all played a part in me starting something but then not finishing it completely - especially because I moved on to begin another task. Some current examples are my clothing line and my shoe line and my podcast. All still around but not as prevalent as the music.
Ok, so what was it? Did I just get bored w/ one and move to the next “hot thing”? Did I not have a passion for the previous projects and walk away from them because they weren't “profitable”? NOPE & NOPE! I've always wanted to do each thing that I started and what I have yet to tackle. ONE of the major obstacles were time, focus & execution.
I eventually am going to become my own “One Stop Shop” for everything I have going on. But, my focus was skewed because of “self inflicting pressure” I put on myself. Some non-existing expectations I made myself carry because of a band of critiques who didn't exist were going to judge me if I didn't. So, a lot of the issues were me in my own head - sort to speak.
But, the bombshell REALLY hit just a few weeks ago when I happen to see 2 videos; of the same point but not by the same person or time frame, speaking on the importance of sitting in silence. This is a dangerous place to be because then your brain begins to fill the noise w/ “stuff” and then you begin to act. You act because it's an automated “to do” thing or you do it to drown out the noise your mind is turning louder by the second. Either way, sitting in silence for 10 mins can make a WORLD OF DIFFERENCE in how the rest of your day/night goes.
I tried it…AND IT WORKED! So, naturally, I stopped for a week because I know it works and I can just get back to it. But, then I realized that I went back into that toxic behavior and made it my goal to SIT MY AZZ DOWN for 10 mins and do NOTHING!
Its going to be difficult for you newbies, because you're going to have the itch to move. Fight it! You're going to want to reach for your phone and occupy your eyes. FIGHT IT! Best time to do this is 1st thing in the morning! Reach for your phone to ONLY turn off the alarm and then set it back down - SCREEN DOWN - and just sit there.
Your brain is going to flow a cascade of images and thoughts and sounds and all kinds of cool tricks that is going to make you want to walk TF away. FIGHT IT! It's part of this “process”. After about, what seems 3 yrs but actually just 2 - 3 minutes, you will notice things start to quiet down and move slower. I see it as your brain is behaving like a hyper kid charged on sugar and has all this energy to burn. By sitting down and letting your imagination run around, you're letting it burn off all that “extra energy”. So, after about 10 minutes, you might feel a unusual difference in peace and calm. Do this for a week and it's almost like Day 3 you “feel” like a whole different person. You might even notice your thought process may seem less chaotic and you have more energy to do things that you normally would have been “too tired” to do.
Now, with this new toy I have, my days are different. My approach is different. When I feel that I need to take a break, I no longer “push through” because I'm being lazy. I now know I just need to take a step away and allow my brain to quiet itself down. Maybe go outside and breathe some fresh air, take a walk around the block or just go and “touch grass”.
This new accepted discovery has allowed me to understand that overwhelming yourself isn't a sign of strength or leadership. It's a sign of self-neglect and lack of a boundary - to yourself!
I hope this post gave someone some insight on reflecting on how they approach certain things; work related, home related or mental awareness. And I hope that anything that I suggested sparked something for you to look into and possible experiment for yourself. Change won't take real change overnight. It might take a few days to a few weeks for noticeable change to occur.
Three weeks to make a habit - Three weeks to break one. Just trust that if you want to create something different, you need to put in the work to learn what works for and/or against you. Then, trust that you can learn why it did or didn't.
You got to trust yourself to be able to improve yourself. But, before all of that, you got to trust you are doing the right thing.
you got to just, trust the process - regardless of the time it takes YOU
D. Cal
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